Mother’s Day Special – Tribute to all moms

Mother’s day is around the corner, and I wish to say to her Happy Mother’s Day and I LOVE you mom. I guess it is an oriental culture that we always preserve this word from parents, haha, but now I am in Australia, so it could be a change for better.

Raising a son like me is never easy, huahuahua (devilish laugh), and I think my mom will agree that I am quite a restlessly naughty person (like a monkey), maybe not now, but I used to be.

Let me share with you guys the story of my mom and I, and how we get along since I was born.

I really want to write about this story for quite some time while I am still able to remember some fragment of this journey, so that I could read this story if next time I am too old to remember what happen when I was small.

Of course, the story starts biologically when a sperm meet with an ovum, and I am the zygote. Days of after I am born as the eldest son after my elder sister, I received much attention and love from the family (this is as according to my mom, not self declared… haha). If I remember correctly, after giving birth to me, she quit working from the court as a translator, just because she wants to babysit us.

But baby sitting me is never easy. Why? According to non-scientific reasoning and it is a Chinese belief that, if a person has two rotary lining pattern of the hair on the temporal part of the head, and he will have the following characteristic: hyper, stubborn, aggressive, naughty, mischievous. And without much elaboration of my character that I used to possess, I just can tell you that I have two rotary hair lining pattern on my head. So I am already stereotyping myself as a problem maker and with attitude problem.

When I was small, I always see my mom as a very strict person. When people ask me, who do you like more, your dad or your mom? Of course I will say my dad, because my dad doesn’t really scold us while my mom is like a police woman in the house. But if that person asks me again today, I will say I will love them both as always. Not because I have learnt to speak in a politically correct manner, but it is just sincere in my heart that I understand them better now. But back then, she and her ‘magic wandssssssssssss’ (cane, rottan, and make sure you see the sssssss, meaning infinite number of the cane) is like many body in one mind (Buddhism with cane also, cool huh. haha). Especially when I created problem, and if I see her, I see the ‘magic wandsssssssss’. And the end result will typically be love bite by the cane all over my body.

If my memory serves me right, I was about 5-6 years old, and I light up a candle because I was a discovery for me to know that I could produce fire. And the next observation was, if I put the candle under a desk, then the desk will become dark (note: not burned, just carbon residues on the plank stage), and I could rub it off. So I just keep ‘experimenting’ with the fire. And it was my parents who found out that I locked myself in the room and play with fire, they rushed in and shout at me, and even beaten me, but in fact they had saved my life.

Another incident that I could never forget was that I was nearly got rid from my house by my mom before I got into secondary school. For certain reason, I couldn’t remember what the issue for the argument was, all I remembered was I had a big fight with my mom when I was 12, she was so pissed off with me. She scolded me with her ‘magic wand’, but I am also immunized with the ‘magic cast love bite’ with my thick skin. And further provoking her, she burst into tears, and then she was so disappointed with me and told me that she wants to send me to military school or outward bound school. And I don’t really care about that, and further provoke her. And then she immediately pulled me out from my house, and say she will get rid of me immediately. Normally a parent will not do that unless they are really disappointed with the child. And trust me, I been through that stage before. The idea of getting rid of me is very new to me, so I fear it might happen, as I am still aware that I couldn’t survive without a roof, and so I quickly let go of my mom’s hand and bear hug the pillar in front of my house and never let go. And she was so disappointed with me, she went back into the house. It was a lucky day for me, but I guess I hurt my mom badly in her heart.

Maybe I never tell my mom what was the reason for my mischievous, so I shall use this blog as my platform to convey this message:

Mom. Sorry that I have created so much trouble in the past. It is not that I want to be naughty, but I am just being too creative in many ideas and want to try to see what the outcomes of these ideas are. Please forgive what I have done to you.

Going to secondary school is a turning point to me, as I stayed in hostel. The first step I step on CHKL hostel, I smell the sense of freedom. Freedom from my mom’s ‘magic cast’ and freedom to create more creative ideas. So my peers always have problem with their stay in hostel as their find themselves too homesick, but I enjoyed all my moment in hostel. Since I thought I want to be independent, I just have to know how to survive with my hostel mates, and made many sincere and long lasting friendships. Still, I will be rebellious, with new ideas.

Mom, if you remember after I enter CHKL hostel, I was a period of very cool and dull, don’t speak much. Have you figured why I did that? If not, today you will have your answer. Staying in the hostel is like mixing a pot of red bean, green bean and even soya bean, and then cook until become congee. While I was in hostel, I meet some of the ‘cool’ kids, where they don’t speak much and that was the fashionable character in hostel to show that you are cool. So I thought that I could adapt that character in me, as I was never been labeled as a cool student. But it was also this character that made you worried a lot. I am sorry again.

Six years of hostel like is not too long, but for me it was the place where I structured my character. I became more matured from the hostel experience. But it was also this six years, which started a ‘normalization diplomatic status’ with my mom haha. After graduation from CHKL, I stay back home again. I realized that are too many things to catch up in the family.

I also remember having a sincere dialogue with my regarding how to improve my relationship with my other siblings, since I haven’t communicating with them much during my hostel period. Open heart dialogue will always lead to sincere understanding of both people.

Just like any relationship, there are ups and down. I have not been a good son since I am young, but then I have made changes. I don’t know whether she will agree, but I can proudly say that I give less trouble to my mom. Maybe is lack of creativity to be mischievous as I aged, but who cares, as long as I am no trouble maker, that is a good sign.

I also admire my mom as she is also a wonderful woman. She has strong will to do things for the sake of the family. As a housewife for more than 10 years, she decided to take up Law subject in the age of late 30. I don’t see many people can do that, but because of my mother’s challenging spirit to study and to take care of us, it was no easy task for her to challenge everyday routine house work life and need to study until 3am in the morning to do her revision. And I could say that I am really learning this spirit from her everyday.

I am so fortunate to have such a wonderful mother. This year, I am not around to celebrate mother’s day with you. Haha, also not like I will do something special when I am at home. But I promise to take good care of myself over in Melbourne, and just like the Gosho, as a votary of Lotus Sutra, the heavenly god will protect him faithfully.

P/S: Please ask Ley Tian, Ley Yee and Ley Yeow to read this: Please take good care of mom and not let her worry for our daily life. We have a wonderful mom and we have to treasure and cherish her every moment possible. Of course, there are ups and down, so just be patient and you have to know that our mom love us every single moment forever.

I love you mom. And salute to all mom around the world.

I think I should write something during father’s day also. Good idea? Haha.